Self-Discrepancy Theory
Definition
Self-Discrepancy Theory, developed by psychologist E. Tory Higgins, suggests that we have different “self-concepts” and that discrepancies between these self-concepts can lead to emotional distress. The theory proposes three main self-representations:
- Actual Self: How we currently see ourselves; our strengths, weaknesses, and typical behaviors.
- Ideal Self: How we want to be; our hopes, dreams, and aspirations. This is the best version of ourselves we strive for.
- Ought Self: How we believe we should be; duties, responsibilities, and expectations set by ourselves and others. This is often tied to avoiding negative consequences.
The theory argues that when there's a gap between any of these selves, we experience negative emotions. Discrepancies between the Actual and Ideal Self often lead to feelings like sadness and disappointment, while discrepancies between the Actual and Ought Self lead to feelings of anxiety and unease.
Example
Maggie is a student who actually spends most of her free time relaxing with friends and pursuing hobbies (her Actual Self). However, she ideally wants to be a highly ambitious and successful entrepreneur, running her own business and making a big impact (her Ideal Self). She also believes she ought to be a diligent and focused student, achieving high grades to please her parents and secure a good job (her Ought Self).
If Maggie consistently prioritizes relaxation over studying or developing her entrepreneurial ideas, she'll likely experience:
- Sadness and disappointment because she's not living up to her Ideal Self.
- Anxiety and guilt because she's falling short of what she believes she ought to be, potentially worrying about disappointing her parents or jeopardizing her future.
This internal conflict, stemming from the discrepancies between her different self-concepts, causes her emotional distress.
Why it Matters
Understanding self-discrepancy theory is important because it helps us understand the why behind many common emotional experiences. It explains why we feel bad not just when we fail to achieve goals, but also when we perceive a mismatch between who we are, who we want to be, and who we think we should be. This theory has implications for understanding depression, anxiety, and even consumer behavior. Recognizing these discrepancies can be a first step toward addressing them.